Her Silent Tears”

So many Regrets…

So many sorrowful ‘Had I Know!’.

She wish she could turn the hand of time backward.

She begged for an opportunity for a replay.

She prayed for a second chance.

Her regrets are overwhelming, she woke up everyday wishing everything to be a dream. ‘She wouldn’t have made this mistake if she was not naive’…”She said to herself”

Naive she was, she just left Home, what she assumed would be same with the environment she was stepping into. The speed at which everything was changing was competing with her emotions, she wants to blend in, she needs to blend in, she said to her self, staring at the mirror as she leaves every morning. She doesn’t want to look like an outcast, she was open to as many information that ensures she belongs, the immediate different Home Friends was supplying the ready information needed, the fictional movie where staring up the psychological “butterfly base emotions”. I think I can do this “so she say to her self”. 

Nobody prepared her for this, Home was busy nursing her but failed to expose her to what the real world is. Home was keeping her safe but failed to teach her on how to keep her self safe outside it. Home failed to teach her the way of the real world thinking she was still young until Home was no longer there to act as home, she finally left Home. The FAITH tried to rescue her from falling into the errors Home failed to train her about, But she was too carried away with so many things. Who will rescue her now?, who will save her from what the real world is about to do to her…

He on the other hand, He is mature, He has been outside the Home for long, He understand how the real world works, He knows She is naive, He knows she is new, He knows she doesn’t understand how the real world works, He knows the Home must have failed to teach Her how the real world works, He knows She is too carried away to be saved by FAITH, He had it all planned out for Her, This is not his first time, She is not His first, He already has different strategies; He knows if the emotional words doesn’t work, the caring would, He knows that if those two fails attention and being there all the time will not, He was sure he was going to get her, He was certain she is Naive…

He was already fitting in Her *Butterfly base emotion* already, she was already dreaming of He to be her ‘Jumpiu’ (a Korean Love film star), He was already fitting into her Knight in Shinning armour, He was always there for her, He was like she wish him to be, He couldn’t be better, “she say to herself”… She was already picturing a future with Him, she already have it all planned out, He was like a God sent to her, what More could she want, He’s almost through she said to herself, He was like a brother, Like a parent she never had, she look up to Him to lead her as He already knows more, She has faith in Him, She believes in Him, She has confident in Him, She trust Him, afterall He was her first outside home, She felt this is another Home, She surrender all her naivety to His feet, she was ready to do whatever He says…

Yes I have gotten her, now I can execute my plan, I now have control over her, I can now do whatever I want with her, He said to Himself.His plan was perfect, She did not suspect anything, her naivety prevented her from suspecting, she thinks It’s normal, she thinks it’s a way of blending, She thought He was on her side, She trusted He, She looks up to He, She believe He could never had wished her bad, All what She knew was what He was what telling her, Her immature emotion crave for He’s acceptance, She wants He to See Her as been perfect, She wants He not to ever be disappointed by her, She submitted her pride at He’s feet even when She never wanted to, She never knew that was He’s target all along, She was Naive, She was New, He showed his real self…

She has been lured, She have been deceived, She has been extorted, regrets is only what she have left, finally the veil of naveity seems to be dropping off, she has learnt the hard way, Her heart shattered, who could She say it to, who could she share her agony with, Her pride rubbed off her, Her silent tears and sobbing remains her only companion in the dark, she went back Home, Home thinks she is Fine, Home thinks she survived while away, never did Home know that what Home has built for long as been stolen due to Homes lapses, She wished she had stick around with Faith, Now she understood what Faith was trying to do all along, the damages has been done already,who would she talk to, who will understand her now, who should she confide in, who will she trust with her story now, who will not mock her of her naivety, the silent tears grew deep…

What would the world say if She shared her story, won’t they Judge her, wont they think she was stupid, won’t they say it was all her fault, won’t they say she was wayward, won’t FAITH say she belongs to the outside world, won’t Home think she never listened to Home’s training, was it Her Fault?, was it her fault that she was naive?, was it her fault that she was never knew the way of the Outside world?…Her questions grew more and more, she was too scared to share her part of the story, she was too scared to look at Home and tell Home what Home failed to inform her ,what she was going to face outside Home, Had i Know she, Had i Know I would have submit to FAITH, maybe I wouldn’t have meet myself here, Her silent tears cloud her heart, I wish another Chance, she said to herself…

Sometimes we need to Look away from Judging her to listening to her, we needed to hear Her own side of the story, its not her fault she learned the hard way, her heart bleeds don’t add to the agony by Judging, enough of the castigating, She suffers in Silence everyday, Home need to start opening her eyes to what she would face in the real world, FAITH needed to never give up on her, she is new, she is naive, thats she missed it, it was never her fault…

*Note:* This write up came as a result of the uneding menace of the ‘advantage takers’ in our midst, it was never meant to castigate anyone but to call out for help, she suffers in Her Silent tears, dying in it daily, I beseech you reading this piece to do all your possible best to aid rescue Her from falling into the set down traps of He, you never can tell, your little could go a long way *[You might not be an Home to her today, neither a FAITH, but  you might be …tomorrow]

*I dedicate my birthday to as many ‘She’ out there suffering in Silent tears and agony, I pray God wipe away your silent tears…* 

*Written by;  Akande Olaoluwa*

*08031372979*